Less than 24 hours before Steph’s surgery, while we were at the Clinic to fill a prescription and eat breakfast at Au Bon Pain, Dr. Lytle’s office called Steph on her cell phone. Surgery had been overscheduled, Dr. Lytle will be on vacation next week, and the cardiac unit is booked to capacity (“no room at the inn”). Thus, no surgery for Steph tomorrow. Both of us are outraged, and wondering if we have the emotional reserves to go through the experience of this week once again. In between lodging and having to eat meals out, plus prescription co-pays at the Clinic’s pharmacy, this safari cost us a small fortune. Susie has been a wreck since Steph called and told her the surgery wasn’t happening. At first, I thought she’d be happy that Mommy would be home sooner, and would be able to go to her play, keep swimming, etc.
The exact opposite turned out to be the case. Susie was upset about Steph having surgery, being in Cleveland while Susie remained in Columbus, missing her play, etc. We mollified her a bit by telling her that Steph needed this surgery in order to survive and live longer. So now Susie is scared to death that Steph is going to die. We’ve put her a little at ease, but we don’t know how much.
On Monday the 11th, Steph will be seeing the cardiac surgeon at Riverside who did her ’99 surgery. She’s going to be blunt: How long can she live if she foregoes the procedure altogether? If it’s imperative that she have it to live, how long can we afford to wait?
Pat is coming up here early tomorrow morning and driving us back to Columbus. He was planning to drive up in the predawn hours so he could wait with me while Steph is in surgery, so now he’s leaving Columbus 1-2 hours earlier.
I can’t fully vent how I feel about this whole thing–not to mention Steph’s feelings–but if I was to type it all out right now, I’d probably damage this keyboard beyond repair. So I’ll post this while I can maintain relative civility and stability.